How to Make America a Better Place

There’s one simple thing that could easily improve the quality of life in America: everyone needs to adopt an accent from the UK.  I mean, how cool are their accents? (Although I’m still up in the air about Welsh…) My sister recently showed me some episodes of the British show Dr. Who, where the actors/characters have a variety of neat accents, and I realized that’s what America was missing- cool accents.  Sure, there are various and sundry accents found around the US, but none could really be considered “cool.”  Think about this for a moment- whenever some sort of American accent is used in a movie, it is almost always to mock the ridiculousness of it or create a caricature of the people with that particular accent.  People don’t use American accents in the media because they sound cool, they use them because they often sound silly.  Now UK accents- that’s a whole different story.  I mean, those are really cool.  Some sound intelligent, others just sound fun.  Half of them don’t even pronounce the letter “r,” and yet they still sound way smarter than any American.  People in America must have had British-ish accents at some point in US history, for a lot of Americans came to the colonies from England.  Unfortunately we the people decided to change everything from the side of the road we drive on to the spelling of "colour" and "favourite," and apparently the accents just had to change too.  Well, we won the war, but we lost the cool accents.  You win some, you lose some...  One that the British definitely won was representation in movies; for every movie in the English speaking world involving fantasy, history or royalty, regardless of the country in which it takes place, the accent of choice is usually British or Scottish.  And there’s a reason for that.  It’s because they sound frickin’ awesome.

I would just like to take this moment and thank everyone who has come to America from the UK (and Ireland- Irish accents rock too)- we appreciate the auditory contribution to our country.  And to all of the cool-accent-lacking Americans out there: let’s create an accent revolution, and make America a pleasant place to listen to.  And God Save the Queen.