Accepting New England: Cross Country Skiing and Why Everyone Would Enjoy It

Firstly, about this new column (and I’m just calling it that to pretend I’m fancy), “Accepting New England.”  There are a lot of little annoying things about living in New England, but instead of focusing on the bad (been there, done that), I figured I’d try to enjoy some of the good.  And surprisingly enough to, well, pretty much everyone, there are some cool things about living in New England, one of which is cross country skiing.

Since New England gets a decent amount of snow during the winter (approximately much more than some places and quite a bit less than others), it’s just something you deal with.  It’s cold, stays in parking lots until May and makes it hard to drive anywhere, but it also gives you snow days (yay!) and cross country skiing (double yay!).

(Little known fact: you can also dance and XC ski simultaneously)

Sometimes when I talk about my love for XC skiing people look at me like I’m crazy.  One, because I am crazy, and two, because it’s the opposite of cool.  Oh well.  Anyway, I think that mostly everyone would like XC skiing, and here’s why:

(to properly use the following information, search until you find the sentence that best describes you.  do not read any other sentences.  they are not for you.  nope, not even you, over there.)

-       for people who like to color within the lines - there are trails that have lines where your skis go, that way you’ll never venture off on a scary path, and you always know where you’re going,  Also, please don’t be afraid to color outside the lines- otherwise you’ll never be able to color in the sky, for goodness sake. (I would know, I thoroughly enjoy coloring in coloring books.  Sorry, moving on…)

-       for people who like to wear sporty athletic clothes - There are so many cute little exercise pants and colorful fleeces that you can wear while XC skiing.  Unlike downhill you don’t have to wear snow pants, so you can look cool and put together, and all that jazz.  And I’m super envious, because when I go skiing I look like this: 

-       for people who don’t like snow (like me) - XC skiing can give you a reason to appreciate snow, or at least to find something good that can come out of it.  This may reduce the frequency with which you hit your pillow when you wake up to a fresh blanket of snow.  Then again, I’m not going to promise anything…

-       for people who are allergic to snow - …sorry, I don’t think I can help you.  I’d suggest never trying it…I can’t imagine it would end well for you…

-       for people who like to and/or feel obligated to exercise - XC skiing can be great exercise, at least that’s what my leg muscles tell me the day after.  Then again, I may be a teeny bit out of shape…

-       for people who like acronyms - XC.  It’s short enough to text about.

-       for people who like yoga - while XC skiing you can easily end up in some sort of yoga position.  Is it intentional?  Usually not.  Is it still yoga?  Well…sure.  (Additional note: such strange positions can include splits, snow angel (face up), starfish (face down), pretzel, and a whole lot more.  Think “Twister” with skis and poles involved.  Yeah, it can get complicated fast.)

-       for people who never got to use ski poles - were you a beginner skier as a child who always wanted to use ski poles like all the big kids?  Me too!  We should talk, I think we’d be really good friends.  Also, you get to use ski poles for XC skiing, so that’s awesome.  You get to feel all grown-up and cool.  (Also, it’s impossible to ski without them…)

-       for people who are scared of heights - good news, XC skiing goes across the country, no ups and downs necessary.  This means no flying up to the top of a mountain in a scary metal contraption with sometimes nothing holding you in except a thin metal bar, and no skiing down what you thought was a gentle sloping hill at the bottom but from the top appears more like a cliff face.  You can literally ski across a flat open field as long as there’s snow.  (If there isn’t snow, you can still try, but I’m quite doubtful of any success).  Anyway, no need to go to high heights- now your friends can stop making fun of you for being scared to ski, and can start making fun of you for doing XC skiing.  Don’t worry- therapy helps.

If you didn’t find something above that describes you, please change yourself to fit an above description and then return to this page.